Friday, January 25, 2019

Smile! You're Not On Churchy Camera

Area Criminal Doesn't Count On Background Check

In September Mark Halburn was shopping for a church. One where he could go in, throw his weight around, and impress everyone with how media savvy he was.


On December 10 Halburn wrote:
"The great news is I found a great church where I've joined the video crew. The bad news is that I didn't get to go, today, because they canceled services because of a sever storm forecast that ended up being moderate rain... Not a single snowflake in our area!"

On December 26 things seemed to take a turn for the worse.


Sounds like Halburn didn’t count on his new church’s “video ministry team” or whatever doing background checks like they do in real places.

Lost your papers is shorthand for "You're not going to get the job because of your background."
Most people take the hint.
He clearly failed the background check and now is demanding to know why.

And they’re just sort of ghosting him on it.

Then, on January 25th another vaguebook post. It's clear he misses Topix.


Protect My Ministry is a company that serves churches by offering national criminal database searches for volunteers and employees. If the applicant has no record, it's reported instantly. For serial offenders like Halburn the task is a little more complicated.

If there is a hit on the records, there is a 24-48 hour process of re-verification, in which the county courthouse records are updated to the national criminal database records, prior to sending results back.

Prior to sending national background results to their clients, they verify the accuracy of the information by thoroughly reviewing every positive record hit returned from the national criminal & sex offender database. These records are “frozen” for further investigation at the county courthouse.


 Records are first validated based on whether or not they positively match the applicant’s identity. This prevents false positives, which can happen when doing national database searches. They also filter out un-reportable records such as. parking tickets.

A background check can be as little as a one-county check or as in-depth as a security clearance investigation. Public and private records can be searched once the applicant gives his consent.

Typically, their turnaround time on submitted requests is typically the same day to 48 hours.

A final report from Protect My Ministry includes the following:

    Case numbers
    File Dates
    Complete description of charges
    Sentencing information
    Disposition and dates
    Cases with multiple charges will be fully explained

For Halburn, that's going to be a long list.

How shit of a person do you have to be to be turned down by a church as a volunteer? Better find another church that doesn't care about the safety of its members, fatboy.