Hey, it's Father's Day

Here's a little song forHalburn.
How's it feel for another man to be raising your "son", fatass?
At least he's a man the boy can look up to instead of one to be embarrassed about.

The Crazy Wall

Halburn is OBSESSED with getting his kid's picture taken. He gets his picture taken constantly.

Halburn lives in a tiny, one bedroom garage apartment in Dunbar. Virtually every single inch of wall space is covered with pictures of the boy. It's a creepy shrine. There can't be an inch of wall space without a picture. It's not that big.

He takes the kid and has his Portrait made for every single birthday, Valentines Day, Easter, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, school, soccer, basketball, the list goes on and on. 

You know when the police go to a serial killer's home and his walls are covered with his victims' pictures?  It's like that. 

And these aren't pictures most people have in their houses. 4x6s, 8x10s. No. That's not good enough for MARK FUCKING HALBURN. 
These are 10x13s, 16x20s. Huge prints, almost poster sized. And all framed.
All this from a guy who makes less than minimum wage and had his child support payment cut at least three times.

And he's been banned from almost every photo studio in town.
Sears
Target
LifeTouch
Portrait Innovations

He goes in and immediately starts complaining.
He had to wait. They couldn't accommodate his special requests. The photographer wouldn't do what he wanted. Other patrons and their kids are annoying. Harassing employees. Calling names. Throwing things. Reshoots. And all with a coupon. And he still complains about the results.
Which results many of the times in comped pictures.
He bitches enough and they just give it to him.

At one point he even borrowed a prop from another photographer and took it to Target for them to use. That takes a lot of nerve.

As the kid gets older he looks more & more uncomfortable in these photos.  What used to be smiles have turned to grimaces. That kid has to have some emotional problems from this stuff.

"At Target Portrait Studio having the boy's annual Father's Day portrait shot. There are children (REPEATEDLY) whining "mommy" and "daddy" to parents who are 1) Ignoring them. 2) Failing to tell their lovelies to "QUIET!" Then there are the middle school and elementary school sisters who are LITERALLY slapping each other around while their "dad" ignores them. Makes me grateful that 1) I would NEVER ignore the boy this way. 2) He KNOWS not to whine. 3) He is an ONLY child! ROFL!!! (It could be worse-BROTHERS draw blood!) Next, I will go to the pain killer aisle and buy a HUGE bottle of Excedrine Maximum Strength!"

1). You would NEVER ignore the boy this way? Not unless you were writing an article for your blog or posting on Facebook or attacking someone on Topix or digging through the trash for bottle caps.
2). Only daddy is allowed to whine.

DENIED!

In his ongoing battle to be recognized as a legitimate journalist, Halburn has been soundly rejected again by West Virginia State University.

At least there's one government office that has the balls to tell him no.

 

Not a bonafide news service? Has she not seen his headset?
Many times it is easier to get press credentials with a title of 'blogger' or 'podcaster' than that of journalist, of course it helps if you're not an asshole too.    
 
I'm sure he has already located Ms. Osborne's address and is in the process of  harassing  her unmercifully.