Big Macs, Whoppers, Thickburgers, Shit Sandwiches.
I'll Eat Anything If It's Free!!!
When a PutnamLIES.com reader allegedly telephoned me a while back to brag about the cheeseburgers at Crackside Cafe, I, admittedly, was already drooling. After all, I have Bell's palsy. But since they're a long time "advertiser", I figured I could lie to my readers and pretend I didn't know anything about their food in order to squeeze out a few "media" meals if I promised to write a flattering article about their bar food.
I'm still drooling.
I'm from California, where every restaurant makes the food here seem like low grade dog food. In Putnam County where a hamburger is considered fine dining, Crackside Cafe is king of the bun. I don't drink but Crackside has FANTASTIC cheeseburgers!
"We wanted to do something really different," says owner-operator William Worth. "So we start off with a bun with sesame seeds on it! Then we add mustard, onions and lettuce. For those with really exotic tastes, we can add tomatoes and pickles. Watch out!"
I went all out and had mine topped with onions, bacon, and some of their delicious au grease dipping sauce. Yummy! Crackside's massive cheeseburgers barely leave room for several sides of French fries and onion rings. Warning: Leave plenty of room for me to sit. A Crackside cheeseburger dwarfs a Slider and stares down a Scottie's burger. Someone needs to invite me back every night.
When I need a little snack I try one of Crackside's double cheeseburgers. We dare you to eat one in one sitting. I usually eat two or three for dinner and another couple for lunch the next day.
I can't wait until I have a heart attack or stroke so I can sue them! Hello, easy street!
They may be a dive, but they have plenty of free food for me.
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