Well, I planted my 10 Norway spruce trees Saturday. Or rather, my wife planted them after I locked the boy in the closet. That's right, I lounged around while she did all the work, and why not, she's the breadwinner of the family, she should have to do most of the work.
Hey, I helped. I dug a couple of holes, but my obesity and diabetes don't allow me to exert myself physically, so I ordered her around while she hauled water and mulch. Meanwhile, I drank a cool, refreshing lemonade. I'm not a real man so I don't have to worry about having MY wife do all the work. She's like a mule, that woman.
Here's my scam. I joined the Arbor Day Foundation. I paid $10 for a six month membership and got 10 free trees. Then I told everyone that I paid a bundle for them.
So I got 10 8 inch trees. FREE! HA! That'll show Silly Scotty and Raymond "Joe" Haynes.
If you're lucky, god willing, I'll be long dead before they're as tall as my boy.
I wonder if there is a National Sound Wall Day Foundation?
Someone should call Animal Control over there on Grace Drive.
ReplyDeleteWe got a mule, a hog, and a baby hippo running around stinking the place up.
It smells worse than Wal-Mart does on the first of the month, where Mark and his family of animals slop around getting sacks of goods.
I saw those poor little sprouts today...the odds of them surviving the first Sunday of mowing while church services are being held are pretty slim.
ReplyDeleteJust left Walmart and didn't see these trees that GreenthumbBlob assisted with. Too many high weeds in the yard. I'm sure Greenthumb could spot them from the road, he's an eagle eyed ace publisher as we know.
ReplyDeleteIf he's too lazy to cut his own grass, he could hire someone. But he's too cheap for that.
ReplyDeleteA real dilemma.
One of the "family members" who lives there cuts grass on Sundays during church hours... his revenge on Cross of Grace for selling the easement to Walmart...
ReplyDeleteI saw his fat ass struggling to cut the grass a couple weeks ago. He had maybe an eighth of it cut and he already looked severely labored.
ReplyDeleteWe're hoping he has a heart attack or stroke.
ReplyDeleteHe's totally energized when he's taking pictures of pre-teens!
ReplyDeleteWaiting for someone to create a game for facebook (similar to mafia wars) where we can pursue the "publisher" in creative situations and inflict harm (similar to Vice City circa 2002 for PS2). Can you imagine climbing to the roof of the WalMart and using a bazooka, sniper rifle, tank, flame thrower, etc... on the "surrounding" houses. Okay, I'm going to patten this right now. Taking suggestions on the name of said game....
ReplyDeleteWhat a waste. I do like the idea of the game. Lets add a few junk cars that we can lob in his yard, along with lobbing KFC drumsticks.
ReplyDelete