Hallburn Shows His Ass In Charlotte

Escorted From Hotel By Police

The scourge of Putnam County is now stinking up North Carolina.

Halburn's wife had a conference in Charlotte to attend this weekend for the pyramid scheme she's participating in and Li'l Markie thought he'd waddle along with her.



Which he did.
He's now the talk of the hotel industry there.
This weekend he's stayed in a total of 4
hotels. That's right, 4. Count 'em.
There were "pool incidents" in 2 of them.
In the latest incident this morning, Hallburn became very abusive, the police were called and he was escorted from the premises.
What makes this extra sweet?
Because more than likely he got tossed out in front of his kid.
Now junior's seen Daddy in action. The whole family must be bursting with pride.

We're sure he'll have some convoluted explanation. We invite him to tell his side of the story.

Hallburn Gets His Panties In A Wad At 6:15 a.m.

Halburn Attacks, Steals Images From Contractor's Site


Halburn's idyllic life of fucking off was apparently disturbed Tuesday morning by people who actually work for a living.
And since he's too much of a pussy to write about meaningless shit like this in his humorous Walmart blog, he published his latest screed on his opinion blog like it was news.

The workers, from Retention Pond Services in Wilmington NC, are working on the drainage system for the Walmart access road. Their website features copyrighted photographs of idyllic, peaceful scenes which Halburn immediately stole to illustrate his article.
And being completely without ethics, he once again neglected to tell his 29 readers that HE is the Walmart neighbor that he is writing about.

He first fired off an email to Hurricane Mayor Scott Edwards who, if he's smart, has any Halburn emails filtered straight to the shitcan.

Then, at 6:15 am, the mongoloid actually thought he'd get an answer if he called the company's offices. If his past practices are any clue, he continued to call them over and over until someone answered and told him to go pound sand.

Last week he was complaining that the crew had part of the access road blocked, this week he's complaining about something called "excessing" noise.

Just when in the hell are they supposed to do this work, Hallburn? The earlier they start, the earlier they finish. If they would have done this during middle of the night you would have been out there bitching, calling them rude and inconsiderate.

Most people have to get up and go to work in the morning and are gone all day, so someone working doesn't bother them. But we guess you sleep in and get up later to ship your kid off to daycare so you can sit around the house all day in your underwear and jack off.

We thought you had an important job teaching the thugs at one of the worst performing middle schools in Kanawha County. What happened to that? What happened to that Fortune 50 job that you were bragging about getting? Don't you have to get up early for those?

You want common sense fatboy?
Common sense says you don't continually whine about something that you're not going to change.

Well, That Didn't Take Long

Two weeks after switching his phone, internet and cable service, Halburn has filed another complaint with the WV Public Service Commission, this time against Frontier Communications.

In it he complains that he has problems with his internet and TV that interfere with his online masters degree studies from the diploma mill down the road. Because, you know, you can't get a master's degree unless you watch plenty of Phineas and Ferb.
Here's a tip for you, fatsack, Strayer is about 6 miles away. Waddle out to your cheap Korean sub-compact and drive over there.

He's been complaining that he's had to reset his Dish TV box several times after the storms we've had.

Boo-fucking-hoo. Welcome to the world of satellite TV. Get used to losing your signal every time it gets cloudy.

And Halburn, being the communist that he is, says that utility companies that fail to provide proper services to customers should be closed down by the state. That's his solution to everything. Government.

Then when he starts his phone call campaign and calls every five minutes he gets pissed when he gets cut off because he wants to argue with the customer service reps. No wonder he gets hung up on. No one should have to take the abuse you know he's dishing out.

So once again he thinks that filing a complaint with the state will get their attention.

So that's what he did.

At least this time he's not asking for TEN MILLION dollars. He just wants no more interruptions or "crashes".

PutnamEYES.com saw this coming the day he got connected to Frontier.

Let us quote from the article we published last month:

"Is he in for a rude awakening.

The funny thing is that Frontier's TV service is provided by Dish Network. He's really going to blow a gasket every time the wind blows hard and he loses his signal. Plus, he'll need a receiver for his other 7 televisions which is going to cost him at least 7 bucks per receiver per month depending on what bells and whistles he gets.

And then he'll be even more pissed when he finds out that the PSC has no jurisdiction over Dish Network whatsoever.
He won't be able to file a complaint against God about the weather when it rains hard and he can't watch Extreme Makeover or some other lame show.

Frontier just does the billing for Dish. They don't have anything to do with and aren't responsible for supplying the service.

When he eventually gets pissed off about this deal, and you know that he will, they'll be happy to let him cancel his service, except he's going to have to pay Dish $18.00 a month for the remainder of his 24 month contract. Plus Frontier's going to want their $400 early termination fee fee as well."

ESP? No, we just know how Halburn works. We've been living rent free in his head for almost two years now.

We'll repeat: The WV PSC has absolutely NO jurisdiction over internet services or satellite TV services. He has no basis for a claim.

If they're smart they'll let him out of his contract and be done with his harassment. Then he'll have to go crawling back to Suddenlink. And start complaining about them again.

We'll keep you updated and let you know when they deny this complaint.

UPDATE: Frontier has filed their answer and has said EXACTLY the same thing that we wrote above. He won't even let them into his second wife's house to see what the problems might be. They're ready to kick his fat ass to the curb.

UPDATE 2: Halburn filed a response to the answer, by basically doing what he always does: Blaming someone else.
They lied. It's their fault. Blah, blah blah.
And of course if he switches, he wants THEM to find him a new provider. We'd tell him to get lost and pound sand up his fat ass.
This assclown can't seem to grasp that whatever problems he may be having are not under the jurisdiction of the PSC.

The case is:

11-0243-T-C
Mark Halburn v. Frontier West Virginia Inc.
Formal Complaint - quality of service

Greasy Spoon's Greasy Cheeseburgers Rock Halburn's Gut

Big Macs, Whoppers, Thickburgers, Shit Sandwiches.
I'll Eat Anything If It's Free!!!

When a PutnamLIES.com reader allegedly telephoned me a while back to brag about the cheeseburgers at Crackside Cafe, I, admittedly, was already drooling. After all, I have Bell's palsy. But since they're a long time "advertiser", I figured I could lie to my readers and pretend I didn't know anything about their food in order to squeeze out a few "media" meals if I promised to write a flattering article about their bar food.

I'm still drooling.

I'm from California, where every restaurant makes the food here seem like low grade dog food. In Putnam County where a hamburger is considered fine dining, Crackside Cafe is king of the bun. I don't drink but Crackside has FANTASTIC cheeseburgers!

"We wanted to do something really different," says owner-operator William Worth. "So we start off with a bun with sesame seeds on it! Then we add mustard, onions and lettuce. For those with really exotic tastes, we can add tomatoes and pickles. Watch out!"

I went all out and had mine topped with onions, bacon, and some of their delicious au grease dipping sauce. Yummy! Crackside's massive cheeseburgers barely leave room for several sides of French fries and onion rings. Warning: Leave plenty of room for me to sit. A Crackside cheeseburger dwarfs a Slider and stares down a Scottie's burger. Someone needs to invite me back every night.

When I need a little snack I try one of Crackside's double cheeseburgers. We dare you to eat one in one sitting. I usually eat two or three for dinner and another couple for lunch the next day.

I can't wait until I have a heart attack or stroke so I can sue them! Hello, easy street!

They may be a dive, but they have plenty of free food for me.

Hallburn's Readership Stats Disproven!

Numbers Add Up To Deception

PutnamLIES.com has long accused Halburn of exaggerating his hit numbers and now we have proof and we'll tell you how he does it.

Our IT Engineer has laid out how the underhanded scheme works.

First, a couple of technical internet facts.

The technical definition of a hit is:
Each file sent to a browser by a web server is an individual hit.
The technical definition of a pageview is:
A pageview is each time a visitor views a page on your website, regardless of how many hits are generated. Pages are comprised of files. Every image in a page is a separate file. When a visitor looks at a page (a pageview), they may see numerous images, graphics, pictures etc. and generate multiple hits.

For example, if you have a page with 10 pictures, then a request to a server to view that page generates 11 hits (10 for the pictures, and one for the html file). A page view can contain hundreds of hits. This is the reason that we measure page views and not hits.

The conclusion here is that hits are not a reliable way to measure website traffic.

Our expert suspected that he was flooding each visitor with a ton of files to generate hits. It is in fact what he is doing!

Each visit to his site downloads at least 98 separate files to your computer, just on the start page!

The 98 Files that get loaded for every page

More simple math shows that the 80,000 readers that he claims in February actually means that you have to divide that 80,000 by 98. By doing that, you get 816 hits in February, divide that by 28 days and what he is really getting is more like 29 visitors a day. If the unsuspecting visitor happens to click into another section or area, there's another 98 or more hits which further reduces the actual count.

Now it's really easy to see where his numbers come from.

3/3 UPDATE:

After additional testing of Halburn's counter, it was determined that it DOES NOT register unique visitors. As we suspected, each page click and/or refresh is counting as a visitor, so a simple refresh script or bot can drive that number up like crazy. Plus, just like was showed with the hits, the way that his page is designed, with the counter on each and every page, every link that he posts that someone clicks on registers as a "visitor".

For instance, let's say Joe Blow goes to his site. His counter counts that as one visitor, each and every link to a story that gets clicked counts as an additional "visitor", each page refresh counts as a "visitor". It also means that each time he edits it or looks at it himself, it registers as a "visitor".

So as Halburn crows about his numbers, PutnamLIES.com reveals the actual truth.
They're fraudulent. He knows it, but uses the inflated numbers to dupe unsuspecting advertisers, most of which pay nothing anyway. They also help him stroke his overblown ego.

So to his 29 readers, please pass the word about PutnumLIVE.com, Putnam County's Fraudulent News Loser!!!

He shouldn't mess with the computer geeks.

HALLBURN ORDERED TO REMOVE ADS!

Opinion Blog Caught In Another Lie

The Secretary Of State's office has ordered Hallburn to remove the Tennant & Ireland ads from his opinion blog immediately due to violation of election law.

Sources tell PutnamLIES.com that both campaigns were furious that Halburn used their ads without authorization.

PutnamLIES.com reported two weeks ago that he was running an unauthorized campaign ad for Republican gubernatorial candidate Betty Ireland about a week after he started running one for a Democrat candidate, Natalie Tennant.
Turns out BOTH of them were both unauthorized.

Halburn commented last week that the ads were endorsed by the candidates' campaigns. Again, not true.
He said they were paid for by the candidates' supporters who also supplied the logos for the ads.

Will he have an explanation?
Probably something like "They only paid for February", or some such shit. No candidate buys a two week ad. If you have proof, Hallburn, produce it. We'll run it here along with your explanation.

Won't happen.

Why not?

Because he's a pussy that doesn't have the guts to show his face here. He reads us all the time, but he's not man enough to try and defend himself here.
He knows he's been caught, but his mental illness does not allow him to admit that he's wrong.

The candidates and their supporters want NOTHING to do with Hallburn and his opinion blog. They are making a stand for ethical reporting and the large, growing audience of readers that LOVE PutnamLIES.com, which broke yet another daily readership record today!

Here at PutnamLIES.com we promise to continue to report the truth even if a pinhead from Putnam County whines and throws a fit every time we lift up the rug and expose what he has been up to. Trouble is, he was used to being able to do whatever he wanted without question. Now that PutnamLIES.com is here, we call him on his unethical behavior and immoral practices, even when he harasses our publisher, commenters and readers.

Readership and advertising support for Putnumlive.com continues to decline. Hallburn continues to embarrass himself.

We will have more as it develops.

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