First Tuesday In November

Mr. Douche Goes To Charleston
 
Mark Vance Halburn's long dreamed appeal of the final order of his divorce, issued by Kanawha County Family Court Judge Michael Kelly, was heard before the WV Supreme Court on Tuesday, and as expected, he beclowned himself.

Security was heightened in and around the courtroom for his appearance Tuesday, with extra Court officers on hand in the Court itself and at least 20 extra Troopers from the WV State Police in force across the Capitol grounds.

Halburn, who represented himself, came before the highest court in the state dressed once again like a homeless slob, immediately tried a sympathy ploy with his "I'm mostly deaf in one ear ..." excuse. This, from the man that claimed to be able to hear a pin drop in the Hurricane Walmart parking lot.

It was a trainwreck. 

The Court made it clear at the top this wasn't to introduce new evidence. Any attempts by Halburn to grandstand or shit talk were immediately shut down. No bullshit was tolerated at all.

Halburn presented his excuses while laying all over the historic lectern. Jeezus, you lazy bastard, can't you stand up straight for 10 minutes?

Halburn's case consisted not of pointing out of errors in the law made by Judge Kelly, but of him explaining how all the ass-showing incidents he has been involved with over the years were all misinterpreted. The airports, the hotel pools, the arrests, the restraining orders, etc.

We've heard all of the arguments before. First Amendment, my civil rights, dead mother, false testimony, half truths, exaggerations, yadda, yadda, yadda...

The arguments were streamed by the Court and you can be guaranteed their server was overloaded.

 
All the questioning was done by Chief Justice Brent Benjamin.

Surprisingly, Margaret Workman, a vocal child advocate, did not speak.

It had to be difficult for her to remain silent with a notorious domestic abuser before her.

Perhaps the court didn't want her to be a target in the event she's elected the next Chief Justice, which rotates every year. 

And, since Halburn will certainly petition for rehearing once he gets their opinion, she may be at the head of the Court that will deny that.

So, knowing that no woman tells Mark Halburn his business, it's possible they're just trying to stave off attacks on her.

Justice Menis Ketchum, a favorite target of Halburn's insane behavior, remained mute throughout.

It's almost like they all agreed beforehand that only the Chief would talk.

 

Justice Robin Davis was absent.

One of the first questions Benjamin asked Halburn was about a letter submitted to the court that was alleged to be from Judge Kelly. The fraudulent letter, in which he impersonates a judicial official, was referenced in Halburn's final divorce order, It was determined by the Family Court to have come from Halburn. It is shown here in its entirety.

April 27, 2012

Mr. Rory Perry

WV Supreme Court Clerk

Charleston. WV

I Michael J. Kelly have violated the rights of XXXXXX Halburn and Mark  Halburn. I allowed Henry Glass to repeatedly lied in court. I refused to allow Mark Halburn to correct Glass's lies and improperly threatened to throw Mark Halburn out of a conference call hearing. I have repeatedly refused to correct my improper temporary order. I violated XXXXXX Halburn's right to a Spring Break vacation in Myrtle Beach. I am an embarrassment to the legal profession.

Therefore, I immediately vacate my temporary order. I award Mark Halburn the marital home and full custody of XXXXXX Halburn immediately.

I then resign my position as Kanawha County Family Court judge due to my incompetency and arrogance. I agree to move to another state and never practice law or hold public office again.

Sincerely,

Michael J. Kelly

Halburn was asked repeatedly about the fake Kelly letter. Four times. Four. And each time he insisted someone hacked his email. He also said that the email that said that his son missed the opportunity to see his mother was  also sent by a hacker. 

The divorce order says the Kelly letter was submitted. Does not at all say emailed. It says the letter was submitted.  And looking at the letter, it is clearly written as a business letter, not as an email.

Benjamin wanted to know why the language in Halburn's motion was the same as the letter that purported to be from Michael Kelly? He specifically hit on how this letter specifically cites Spring Break and Myrtle Beach and Halburn's motions do as well, especially in light of all of this happening after Halburn had relocated to Myrtle Beach.

Halburn's response?  Blah, blah, blah, dodge, dodge, hack, hacked, hacked, hacked, I have proof I was hacked, I didn't send that email, I was set up by blogs. He alleges that he filed a police report in Fullerton CA. Why there he offered no explanation.

He had FOUR opportunities to come clean.

Halburn actually brought up the voices in his head when he was trying to defend how he would never send anything like that to the court. He said something to the effect of "You can even ask Steve Canterbury that when I was in Poca at Heritage Days and I heard a voice behind me asking me if I wanted them to take care of Watkins or the court that I told him to try to protect the court.

There is no way to describe the level of insane.

Halburn was then asked where he lived when he came back from failing as a part-time bait counter help in South Carolina. Halburn quickly went into a story about having to move to South Carolina because he was "hurting" and finally got around to saying "Dunbar." Benjamin asked two additional times if he had lived anywhere else besides Dunbar after he moved back to West Virginia from South Carolina. It was never in the order that he lived with a kiddie diddler, but the Court knows he did. So they asked. A few times. Each time he insisted he had lived only in Dunbar.

When asked on several occasions how many times he's been arrested since his divorce appeal Halburn begrudgingly had to acknowledge his arrest, but couched everything with how it's still unresolved. Halburn was convicted and sentenced to 45 days in jail but is appealing.

Halburn was asked about what he owed and if he was paying, and he replied he was paying early and more than the required amount. and by more, he means he rounds up to the next dollar. Mr. Generous. Then he complained about having to pay his part of the boy's medical bills for an ER visit.

At one point Halburn asked for a show of hands, like he was on a game show.

Justice Allen Loughry, making his only statement of the day, told Halburn that the Court wasn't answering questions and to get on with it.

Halburn's second ex-wife holds her head as he tries to engage Supreme Court Justices.

Halburn also claimed to not know where his son goes after school -- saying specifically "I don't know where he goes" -- but also claimed he was told the boy goes to sit at his mothers office where a 10-year-old child "watches" him. Another lie. He knows good and well where the boy goes because he and his child molesting buddy followed the school bus there to serve the mother with a summons.

Toward the end of his "rebuttal" to Ms M's testimony, Halburn then went on a rant about how he doesn't know why Ms. M says he says he would take her son to California and never come home. 

In a back and forth about how Kelly order said the visitation situation would be re-evaluated when he was 10, which gave Halburn 4 years to get his shit together, Ms. M said the boy is already fighting her about going to Daddy's house on weekends and she's making him do it. 

She's in no way, shape or form preventing or hindering his relationship with the child. Not at all.

And the mental evaluation that he trumpets over and over as calling him parent of the year actually says he's ignoring the kid. It actually says that he isn't interacting with him.

"This examiner notes having had a brief, unplanned opportunity to observe Mr. Halburn with his son the day following his initial evaluation. Mr. Halburn and (the boy) were visiting a local park. It is believed that Mr. Halburn was unaware of this examiner's presence at the same park. Mr. Halburn... was not actively interacting with him at the time of the observation."

The Court pointed out he's had two court ordered psych exams. One by Hudson and one by Thistlewait for the Walmart litigation.

And immediately Halburn went on defensive saying that Thistlewait was a "hired gun with zero credibility" and he was hired specifically to libel him, etc. 

The Court wasn't having any of it.

As Ms. M pointed out, they both essentially said the same thing. One just said it much more sharply.

Halburn did actually admit that his sole reason of choosing My Family Day Care was an ad trade-out and alleged that Ms. M's only reason for removing the boy from there was to damage his advertising relation with that business.

In trying to spin an 2008 airport incident where he and his family were kicked off a plane, he name drops Fox News anchor Brian Kilmeade.

BRIAN FUCKING KILMEADE.

This may have been the part where Allen Loughry started to laugh.

Another highlight was referencing how he wanted to move back to California and live a block down from Richard Nixon and go surfing.
Note to Halburn: Nixon has been dead for almost 20 years.

Then the MOTHERFUCKER DROPS A DELOREAN REFERENCE IN HIS SUPREME COURT HEARING!!!

Explaining it by saying, "That was humor" 

The only problem was that nobody laughed.

The only thing he left off was how he and Michael J. Fox were in Back to the Future together... Until they re-shot the scene where Halburn and his mom walked out of the J.C. Penney and into the shopping mall parking lot... So, he only made it to the cutting room floor!

Halburn came close to losing control at one point when talking about Kelly, he shouted, "He's a lying..." before stopping himself.

Toward the end, Halburn exhibited a case of fake crying.

Tyler Hollywood even got a sideways hat tip when the judge asked about a $20,000 that he made for Halburn's blog

Halburn's second ex-wife also represented herself.

She was extremely sympathetic, credible and did a very good job presenting her case.
Her main point was that the well being of the child comes first. NOT Mark Halburn's wants.

She expressed the anxiety she felt when Putnam County Circuit Court Judge Philip Stowers loosened up the travel and overnight restrictions Halburn had against taking the child out of state on weekends. She brought up his May 2013 car wreck with the child in the car. And that she doesn't know what really happened. She even was generous to say that she doesn't blame Halburn at all for what happened, because the fact remains that she doesn't actually KNOW what happened.

All she "knows" is that he insists it was a hit and run.

Here's what we think. Fatman fucks around on phone, hits divider wall, endangers child, blames someone else.

Her testimony was STRONG to tie everything to money. She referenced several motions and orders he'd filed in which each one demanded some kind of financial compensation -- $65,000 for a "settlement," $3,000 a month in spousal support, $1 million in sanctions against her lawyer, $10 billion in punitive damages for other things.

That was a great move on her part, because those Justices aren't dumb. Anybody who reads those motions can see that custody of that child equals money to him. It's a meal ticket to continue to pretend he's a big important newsman. The loving father barely mentions the boy by name.

This the end of the road for Halburn's appeal. There is no federal avenue of appeal here. He has no legal standing to bring it before the United States Supreme Court because there are no federal implications in this case. He can scream civil rights all he wants, but "fat, white, mentally unstable divorced guy" isn't a protected class.

Mark Halburn's Court run ends here, but we predict Ms. M will be in family court six times a year until he goes to jail or dies. Or he kidnaps the kid and tries to disappear.

 

Court watchers say the word immediately after the hearing was that this was probably the first time anybody had actually HURT their efforts by demanding an appeal. He did himself no favors.

An opinion is expected before the term ends in another two to three weeks.
The outcome will not be favorable for Mark Vance Halburn. By the end of the year he will be eating a big bucket of legal fail.

Here are the last 16 minutes of the oral arguments before the Supreme Court of Appeals of West Virginia of Halburn's divorce appeal.

The WV Supreme Court case number is 13-0591, Mark H. v. DM.

PutnamLIES.com will have more as it becomes available.