More Televisions Would Make Difference For Man
Mark, 48, is married and has one child. He lives in a filthy but modest $350,000 house owned by his mother-in-law and wife. Other down on their luck family members live there on a transient basis.
His wife is the sole support. Mark works a menial job so that he can feel that he is contributing, but it's barely enough to put gas in either of his two vehicles. In fact, he's so needy he can only afford one brand new car, the other is almost 5 years old. He had been working at a Charleston motel but was let go after several instances of computer abuse. He now shakes the farts out of shirttails at a local laundry.
He also has a severe personality disorder that makes it difficult for him to hold a job or interact with normal people. His weight makes it difficult to do much except his hobby of running what he calls an "internet news site". A number of arrests also hamper his ability to get along in the area.
"He's obese and very difficult. He complains constantly. They only have 9 TVs. Yea, really, 9!" said the social worker familiar with his case.
They desperately need a couple of old televisions for the family room and the child's room of their home. They frequently host guests who like to watch "different" TV shows in another part of the house.
Won't you please help a needy, hateful old bastard have a Merry Christmas?
Needs: Televisions or any other objects of value (beds, computers, used condoms, etc).
Cases published in PutnamLIES.com's Neediest Cases have not been verified by anyone.
Contributions may be thrown onto the front lawn of 194 Grace Drive in Hurricane .
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I have a flaming bag of dog shit I'd like to donate to the cause. But it's cold out, so can I just toss it out my window onto their lawn as I race to the WalMart for some super deals?
ReplyDeleteAnything would brighten up a needy family's holiday season.
ReplyDeleteMike, I think i have figured out why he wants more TV's. I think he is putting them between the fat rolls to entertain the fleas so they don't bite as much.
ReplyDeleteHe seems to be posting for a "teenage" girl alot. Disturbing to say the least.
ReplyDeleteAgain, you have lied. My car is a 2005 model fully paid for that was purchaed in the summer of 2006. My wife drives a new 2010 model. I work full-time AND own a business. My wife works four days a week (sometimes five) - so that she can spend more yome with her son. (She took today off.) Her mother has lived here since 1992. One brother has lived with us for more than a year. There's nothing transient about their residency. Other family members lived here temporarily.
ReplyDeleteAs for the "modest" home, it's nicer than your home-which I am told is a rat-infested single-wide!
Shovel: $19.95
ReplyDeleteBig Hole: $22.50 (Per hour)
Mark's Head: $15.99 (Super size KFC bucket meal)
Mark shutting up? Priceless.
P.S: Mark, if I cut off my penis will you be less afraid?
At least Mike doesn't live next to a Walmart.
ReplyDeleteHer mother lived there since 1992 except for the time she lived in Charleston.
ReplyDeleteIt must be like the fucking Culhanes there at the Martin mansion.
July 23, 2008
Q. Is your wife’s mother still living?
A. Yes.
Q. Does she live with you?
A. Sometimes.
Q. How much of the time does she live with you?
A. What would you say? 30 percent, 50 percent. She also rents a home in Charleston and goes between the two.
Do you really want us to drag out the whole deposition, shitbag?
Drag out the whole deposition. It would totally make my evening to watch PutBlob cower at what is in there. Dude, I beg ya. :)
ReplyDeleteBeing that batshit crazy is a fulltime job, after all.
ReplyDeleteBut I bet fuckstick is just in it for the "benefits".
That 1998 Geocities-esque piece of shit blog of yours is NOT, nor ever has been...a "business."
ReplyDeleteA business is defined as a legally recognized organization that provides goods and services to conumers. Your "blog" is not legal (because you steal images), recognized (who the fuck reads it?), organized (learn how to format). Also, it doesn't provide nothing that's good, and it doesn't service anything...except your ego. Another thing, you have to make money from something to call it a business...and if you are rolling in the dough (which you probably do in the literal sense...bread dough that is) you wouldn't be online begging for shit.
What a role model for that abmonination Delores shit out, eh? It seems he's just like daddy...a whiny, spoiled brat who needs whooped.
Here's an idea, fatty. Get a piece of cardboard and list all the things you listed on that website onto the piece of cardboard. Stand on the nearest intersection and hold the cardboard sign up...and start to work on your REAL job...asking for a handout.
Maybe we'll get lucky and he'll get hit by a car on "accident."
We wouldn't want PutBlob there to get hit by a car, that would crush up someone's car and splatter it with Crisco and KFC Chicken grease and that would just be sad for the driver of the car. Maybe getting hit by a tanker truck that explodes when it hit PutBlob (right after the driver gets out) would be better....yeah, that would work. They would have to repave the road from the grease stain that was Hallburn, but I think the City of Hurricane would gladly repave anything that mashed up Hallburn good.
ReplyDeleteAccording to the Walblob's-Walblog the city don't be repavin' nothin'.
ReplyDeleteMark. God knows why I decided to check out your "enduring Wal Mart" blog but I did. I ate the barrel of a 357 minutes after. The caterwaul of my feline forced me to stop. I had to clean up puke. I then had to apologize to my cat for reading your incessant babble, which, apparently, made me moan to the point it hit her puke note.
ReplyDeleteBut I digress. I'll keep this simple. Your Wal Mart "blog"? Is nothing more than you copying and pasting your own fucking posts and changing a few details! Stop it! This is way out of hand. Just stop it!
As my first act as Overlord I require you to shut this POS site down and wander off into the forest for the final steps of he long walk.
Did anyone else notice that when he refered to young Halburn above ("My wife works four days a week (sometimes five) - so that she can spend more yome with her son.")Halburn says HER son. Could it be that he has doubts about being the father?
ReplyDeleteI'm relatively new here, but a long time Halburn watcher. Excuse me if this has been already answered.
ReplyDeleteWhat is Girl of Words?
girlofwords.com is where the Walmart blog was first commented on way back in April. Mark immediately showed up (under the names of a couple of his sock puppets) and tried to intimidate Jacque (who is the awesome Girl of Words) which didn't work. He tried bullying and threats of lawsuits. He got laughed at.
ReplyDeleteShe and her readers proceeded to hand him his big fat ass a thousand times over making him look like the pussy he is and proving that he can dish it out but he can't take it.
One thread reached almost 2000 comments.
Her page
Putnam: It’s Here,
contains all the Halburn related bitch slapping goodness that is GOW.
After tiring of Halburn's never ending lies and bullshit, she dropped him like a hot potato and had nothing more to do with him.
He, on the other hand continues to obsess about her.
And then we jumped in to pick up the slack.
Thanks for the shout out! :) The compliment of "awesome" is much appreciated!
ReplyDeleteThe final lawsuit tally was 11, by the way, if you count lawsuit threats via e-mail. Maybe with typing that sentence, I'll have bumped the number up to 12.
Legal defense donations can be made to the First National Bank of Care Bears.